Starring Rosebud Baker, Matt Riker, Ben Samuels
Directed by Ben Samuels
First, allow me to say how fantastic it is to be back chucking down my otherwise impractical opinions on various horror films so that you all can be (hopefully) entertained by my mindless babblings. I once again owe a fresh start to my favorite cue-balled lunatic, Uncle Creepy, for the opportunity, so let’s not waste any more precious time, shall we? First flick up on the chopping block is a zombie film that should make video game fanatics (and that’s probably it) shriek with excitement – it’s Ben Samuels’ Eyes of the Dead.
The movie itself employs a slam-bang, drop-your-ass-in-the-driver’s-seat technical edge to it, and a first-person pov is exactly what the doctor ordered if it’s the bullets-whizzing and blood-splashing that you’ve been lacking in your lives. The film’s plot unfortunately follows far too many of its predecessors’ GPS in order to set itself at a distance from the remainder of the horde – we focus upon a farmer (Samuels) whose life has been in the shits since his wife (Baker) suffered a miscarriage, and the toll it’s taken on their marriage is an irreparable one.
If the frayed bonds of wedded bliss aren’t enough to cause a twist in yer knickers, there’s been an extremely toxic chemical sprayed over the crops at the farm, effectively reducing anyone who comes into contact with them into a rampaging, flesh-craving denizen of the undead…(yawn) – oh sorry, have we all been down this road before?
Anywho, as this flick shambles along, we’re exposed to a gaggle of grotesque imagery (some of which was very well presented) and some of the hokiest thespian-ism you’ve laid eyes on in quite a while. When the film inevitably begins its winding-down phase, there are some instances that are simply preposterous to stomach, and while I’m on the topic of “stomach-churning imagery,” as most of you who know me from my previous rantings know, I’ve come to simply detest first-person, found-footage styled productions – the ship has CLEARLY sailed here, passengers, and it doesn’t seem to detract from any new movies using it as a backbone to its structure, let alone the fact that this was originally constructed in 2015.
Now I’m sure that there are more than a few zombie fanatics that will latch on to this movie and let it carry them (well, at least up to the next film), but for this tired old cat, something fresh dearly needs to come along and blow my skirt high over my head, for these Eyes are suffering from an extreme case of bloodshot short-sightedness.